Do you desire to form good habits in your children but you’re not sure why what you have train isn’t sticking? To form habits in children, parents much have these Charlotte Mason habits of active parenting in place for children to form good habits.
THE HABITS OF ACTIVE PARENTING
#1 – Set Expectations
We often get excited about what we want to accomplish as a mom. And oftentimes we say, “I’m going to do this.” We just start plunging through when we get overzealous, but the idea of what it’s going to look like when it’s all put together and we get really excited, we get really hung out and we just go crazy, right? Meanwhile, we leave our kids and our husband’s behind. We don’t really communicate with them what we’re doing, what it’s going to look like, and how we’re going to get there. We’re just telling them you’re going to do this. And it’s important that we set expectations.
What that looks like is communicating with your husband, by saying, this is what I’m trying to do. I’m trying to make sure that there are a good habits in our parenting. Guess what? It’s not just mom. It’s also a dad. Parents need to be on the same parenting philosophy page. It will make you butt heads for years, if you don’t. I know been there done that. You need to understand, it’s not about you telling your husband how to do something, but it’s about explaining to your husband why you want to do something.
Once the husband understands the underlining foundation of why certain things are important to the functions of the home and the habits that are going to be formed in parenting first, then there’ll be get on board.
#2 – Get The Child On Board
If you don’t get the child on board, it’s going to be much harder and it looks different based on the ages. When a child’s really young, getting them on board is not difficult because they want to please you in everything that they do. Getting them on board early is a key.
When your children are a little bit older and they’re already in really bad habits, you need to correct that. How you do that is explain what it is that you’re doing, what it looks like, answering their questions, giving your literal children no gray areas because gray areas can cause an issue.
Setting the expectation for your children is getting them on board, but also helping them to understand that it looks like a certain way.
Answering their questions is important, but also getting that verbal, “Yes, I agree.”
Making sure you’re being positive with your child all along the way, praising their efforts, praising them for accomplishments, but being sure that you’re not praising them for not fulfilling exactly what it looks like.
#3 – Create Parenting Cues
Charlotte Mason tells us that we do not want to have perpetuals commands of do this and do don’t, don’t do this and don’t do this.
If we’re not training our children in good habits, we’re going to forever be saying, don’t do this or do this. So we have to make sure they understand their boundaries and giving our children parenting cues is going to start passing that ownership off to them.
To get them on board in the moment of bad habits presenting themselves, you will need to add a quick reminder in a way of a parenting cue that helps them process what they need to do on their own, without another discussion on the habit being training.
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